Maybe I do not know this yet. But I feel sick. Maybe it’s a bad case of terminal acidity and colitis. But I feel it. I am sick!!
Sometimes I feel I am going to die in a day or two of stroke or heart attack or maybe it’s just the uneasy feeling inside my chest and my stomach that makes me believe so. Not that I’m immune to these modern diseases in fact I’m very much prone to one or all of them. For now I feel my young age helps me tackle these diseases in keeping them at bay. Not long though my whole body may give up and surrender to these fatal opposition. And suddenly I’ll vanish into the obscurity of death.
Figuratively, though I still think in a corner of my mind that I am going to see a much older age and then give up these atherosclerotic diseases after a long battle in a sterilized ICU ward. Sometimes my neurotic cells signal me that I’m developing a long and never ending anatomical condition like intolerance to lactose or processed milk products, or even better a insomnia. I do not know how but I always felt I understood how an insomniac feels – tired, restless and intellectually over processed with bullshit ideas. Maybe it’s not the way a insomniac feels but this is the idea one might get after watching the number of insomniac involving movies I have seen.
Singularly understood as the concept of imagination dominated unpaused brain activity, insomnia may surely lead to a total and ending frustration that might develop in suicidal tendencies. Thankfully though, I’m still terrified of the idea of self destruction.
However, all the consuming processing establishes on truth ‘I am sick!’
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